Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize