im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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My day in three words: secret purse cake
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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