You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize