Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I can't put those talents on a resume
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
well, you know. whores of a feather.
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