Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
