your room smells of hookers.
And success
Apparently you make a good broom.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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