he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize