i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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