We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
