you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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