I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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