real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
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