and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Randomize
