butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
