remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
