Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Randomize
