Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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