Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Randomize
