I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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