Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
