do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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