Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
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