dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
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