i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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