i wish starbucks made bloody marys
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
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