the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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