good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
