I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
