some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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