what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize