Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
