So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I just found puke in my bra..
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize