Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize