I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
one two three fourrrrnication!
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
