peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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