The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
