Rock
Scissors
Fuck
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
