More tranny stories later!
She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Randomize