their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
