elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
