you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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