Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
