Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize