can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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