You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize
