He disabled his match.com account in front of me
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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