i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
The ass gains better be worth it
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