id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
