Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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