Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
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